Life is not about achieving goals, life is about who you become in pursuit of your goals.

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What do you do in your free time?

“If I only had more time, I would ___.” While many people would fill in that blank with an easy leisure activity, like taking a beach vacation or catching up on a favorite TV series, many activities that we choose are more challenging, like learning a new language or perfecting a hobby or skill. All people are innately driven to learn and to grow, because it makes us happy. As Tony says, because progress = happiness.

But it’s not what we accomplish that makes us happy, it’s who we become in pursuit of those goals. And it’s the achievement of the feeling of being that person, or the emotion you experience as a result. Your true driver is not to simply learn to play guitar, but to be the person at a bonfire or a party who entertains and delights others. Your true goal is not to hike more, it’s to experience the feeling of deep connection with yourself and the world around you.

As you set your goals for the year, ask yourself: what is your true, ultimate outcome? How do you want to feel? Who do you want to become? 


Conor McGregor

Professional MMA Fighter

"There’s no talent here, this is hard work. This is an obsession. Talent does not exist, we are all equals as human beings. You could be anyone if you put in the time. You will reach the top, and that’s that. I am not talented, I am obsessed."

Hear Tony and Conor discuss how his incredible drive has pushed him to become one of the greatest MMA fighters of all time.

Identify your specific, measurable goal.

  • Ask yourself, What do I really want? What’s the outcome I’m after? The more precise, the stronger it is. (For example: There’s a difference between “I want to learn a language” and “I want to learn Italian well enough to order at my favorite restaurant.”)
  • How will you know you’ve achieved it? How will you measure success? Whenever possible, quantify your results, and put a timeframe around it. Remember, a goal is a dream with a deadline.
  • Is there someone else who already has the results you’re after? That can help you identify the criteria of what you consider successful. Write these down.

Discover the compelling reason you want these results.

  • What kind of trigger words really motivate you to reach your goal? What are some words around growth that excite you? Progress, elevate, perfect, mastery, discover, explore, immersion? What words really make you want to do something?
  • Ask yourself, Why do I want this? What is my real purpose? Why is this not just a “should,” but a must for me? Associate to the “why” of what you are doing.
  • What will this give me? How will it make me feel? The emotional quality of purpose makes what you will do not only sustainable, but powerful. It’s what will push you through the inevitable obstacles.

Your massive action plan

  • Once you know the exact result you are committed to achieving, as well as why you must achieve it (the purpose), you can now create a MAP – a Massive Action Plan – to achieve it. Ask: What specific actions do I need to take to achieve this result?
  • Remember: There are many ways to achieve a result. If one set of actions doesn’t achieve it, another set will. And, often only a small number of your actions will make the biggest difference in your ability to achieve your goal – 20% of what you do in life makes 80% of the difference. Once you find a strategy to achieving your growth goals that works, double down on it. And abandon what doesn’t work.


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